Our Values: How we define them matters

July 18th, 2011

Our values are one of the key drivers of our performance. They influence the goals we pursue and the methods by which we pursue them.  When our values aren’t fulfilled in a way that is meaningful to us, we feel out of sync and literally, under-valued.  Our performance shrinks. Understanding what our values mean is the key to making choices about how they influence our behavior.

Case Study: An executive who works for an international research agency had a project to empower women in Turkey. Like a well-trained, seasoned corporate executive, she had a highly-detailed plan with an aggressive timeline and the “fire in the belly” to pull it off. A lot was riding on the success of this project: a possible promotion and deep personal satisfaction of helping women in Turkey, her homeland.

As we explored her values, she identified a core value of ‘belonging’ (generically defined: being accepted as part of the group by people you value). Here’s what she said belonging meant to her:

“It feels great when my friends invite me to dinner or ask my opinion about something. At work, when a peer asks me to attend a meeting outside of my accountability so that I can offer a view they might not have, I feel like they value my opinion and me. The best is when my boss asks me to come to a meeting of his peers and talk about my project and what I am doing. When I am included like this, I feel great and am very productive. When I am not in these meetings, my performance can stall.”

Coaching Outcome Identified: Have this long-held value support, not subvert, her current goal.

In the process of working together, she continued to value ‘belonging’ and learned to trust others more, not by changing her value, but by understanding what it meant to her and changing how it influenced her behavior.

“I used to only really trust people who I knew for a very long time. I was wary of new people who wanted to be my friend too quickly. I would not engage with them easily. I certainly would not ask them for something big. I didn’t want to be turned down: that would mean that they didn’t accept me, and I didn’t belong. Sounds weird now, but that’s how I viewed people and my relationship to them. Don’t get me wrong, I had great relationships, but only a small number that I felt connected to.

“Now, with these insights on my values, my project to empower women in Turkey is taking off big time. I build relationships while making big requests of people. I do not wait to make requests until I think I know them enough. My old way of operating takes way too long and, as I see it now, it isn’t even that effective. The vision I want to accomplish needs to happen sooner, not later. Now, when I share the vision of my project and listen to what others get excited about, our relationship is to the vision, to what it will make possible. In a way, we leave our personalities out of it and talk about possibility. There’s something bigger at stake.

When I am feeling out of sync and under-valued, I see which of my values isn’t being fulfilled the way I want it to and I take action to satisfy it rather than waiting. Not only am I empowering the women of Turkey, I am empowering me.”

This person created a new relationship with a value that served her well in the past so that it doesn’t hinder her future. Understanding our values gives us access to our potential and that, frankly, is invaluable.

Employers: Want your employees to be engaged like this? Need to make the business case for investing in them understanding their values? Listen to my webinar, Values: The Energy Source for Employee Engagement, http://www.wipcoaching.com/upcoming-events/.

What’s it gonna take to get what I want? 244 days + perseverance!

June 22nd, 2011

When something’s not happening the way we want it to, when what we get is not what we asked for, when someone promises something and doesn’t deliver … argh … what will it take to make this happen?

My answer isn’t the entire answer, it’s a start. It will take a blend of 5 elements to make something happen that wasn’t going to happen without your action. Check this against your experience.

1)     Purpose: a meaningful goal or commitment.
2)     Perseverance: stick-to-it-ness; maintaining a course of action and purpose over time in spite of difficulties or discouragements.
3)     Assessment: ongoing evaluation of what is happening in contrast with the purpose.
4)     Choice: select one course of action over another.
5)     Relationship: working with others to achieve goal.

A word about perseverance: Persevering is not better than not persevering. It’s a matter of commitment and choice.  We know by experience if we only did things when we wanted to or were in the mood, not a lot of what needs to get done would get done. Plus, we’d also have plenty of regrets. I think that when we take actions that match our purpose, and don’t allow our mood or feelings derail us, we experience our innate, powerful self. And that’s a great feeling.

Case in point: Saga of Southwest Airlines t-shirt

This subject of this story is trivial compared to what you are probably dealing with at work: Marketing materials not done for tomorrow’s trade show; profit lost because product expensively shipped overnight due to poor communication; low revenues; rumor mill that breeds low morale.

While the subject may be trivial, the principles are not. They are fundamental to making something happen that wasn’t going to happen if you didn’t take it on. I hope my story will provide some insight and encouragement for you to be at choice to persevere or not.

Here’s my story… June 2010: After reading in SW’s Spirit magazine that a travel tip selected as the Tip-of-the-Month would be awarded a t-shirt, I submitted my tip. In August 2010, a friend on a SWest flight IM’d me a picture of my tip as the Tip-of-the-Month. 

Not only was I published in a national magazine (Sweet! Check that off my bucket list), I’d be receiving a SW t-shirt. I decided to create an iron-on transfer of the tip, put it on the t-shirt, then send a picture of the t-shirt back to SW/Spirit and see what might happen. I was stoked!  Then I had to persevere.

By the numbers
It took me 8 months (October, 2010 to May 2011), 7 phone calls, 1 letter and 1 email to get 1 t-shirt I wanted and 1 mug that I didn’t. During this time, Southwest called me 3 times, sent 2 emails and 1 postcard. The communications with Southwest and Pace Communications, (the company that handles Spirit magazine) included: “we ran out of shirts and had to reorder” to “we ran out again” to “we don’t do t-shirts anymore” to “we have a ton of t-shirts”.

During this 244 day process, I practiced the following skills:

-        Staying on purpose: get the shirt that was promised and have fun with it
-        persevering and not letting “no” stop me
-        assessing and evaluating if I drop it or keep going
-        choose to let go of disappointment (continually)
-        creating relationship, have empathy for people who have little power or authority

I added to my purpose:  Where is my developmental edge to step beyond? What could I learn about communication? What will I learn that will help me be a better coach?

I had multiple opportunities to communicate what I wanted without communicating my upset. In sharing this story with Karen Calcagno (www.advantagefbc.com) who coaches family-owned businesses, she echoed some keys to effective communication:  Don’t make the other person wrong.  Keep your emotions neutral. Speak as an observer of a difficult situation.

Persevering builds our capacity to persevere. Every time we move forward toward our purpose rather than stop because the critic inside our head tells us to, we expand our skill. We need perseverance when our purpose is to have our business succeed in a down economy or our best sales person quit. We need perseverance to keep our kids from joining gangs, eradicate hunger or save our oceans. Pick something that matters to you and persevere.

PS: Note to self: by June 30^th, send a picture of the t-shirt to President SW, with my article on committed speaking and listening; and, please, no follow-up or perseverance.

Secret to Changing Others: You First

May 19th, 2011

It’s not uncommon for someone to tell me that they want to learn how to get other people to change.

In supporting people in all different industries, cultures and circumstances around the globe to transform their teams from good to great and the results that match, I’ve discovered some universal principles about change: (1) We teach what we tolerate. (2) To lead others, lead yourself first.

We teach what we tolerate

As a leader or manager, if you are walking on eggshells with someone (let’s call her Sally), afraid to raise an issue, hoping it will go away, your actions are keeping the issue in place.  Because you have identified an issue or problem, by not dealing with it, you are tolerating it and teaching yourself that it’s OK to ignore issues. You are also adding mass to the idea that your perception of the issue is accurate and the only one. (We both know that’s a myth.)

If you talk about the Sally Issue with others, and still do nothing, you are teaching them it’s OK to ignore issues and gossip about it.  Plus, you’re teaching Sally that her behavior is OK because you are not telling her any different.    A whole lot of counter-productive teaching and learning going on.

Now the issue shifts from being about Sally to being about you, Leader. Here’s where the second principle comes into play.

Lead yourself first

You’ve offered veiled comments in hopes that Sally will take the hints to heart and change. She hasn’t. You’ve talked in generalities to the team in hopes that she’ll get the message and change. She hasn’t. Now the team wonders how come you keep bringing up the topic “in general.” 

Wake up! It’s you who has to change first, not Sally. You have to lead yourself first before you can lead her.

Remember what the airlines tell you: Put on your oxygen mask first, then assist others.

1. Stop tolerating your ineffective behavior: no more hints and indirect messages.  It doesn’t serve you or Sally.
2. When you talk to Sally, watch that the frustration you may have accumulated doesn’t spill into the conversation with Sally. Remember: this is the first time you’ve told her directly of your view.
3. Take responsibility for not dealing with the issue until now; you may want to tell Sally that, as well.  Revealing the part you play in the situation works.
4. Create a partnership with Sally that includes a plan to resolve the issue and a support structure.
5. Complete the plan.

Avoiding issues drains energy and pulls down everyone’s performance.  As a leader, addressing issues, upfront, immediately and without blame, will get rid of the egg shells so everyone can walk freely and perform better.

How to Reach Metaphorical Mountain Tops at Work

May 11th, 2011

Today’s workers are being asked to do more with less, to reach higher goals with fewer resources and in less time. You understand the need, you want to say “yes” and mean it, but you say “yes” with uncertainty and doubt. What’s going on? How come you can’t authentically say yes to climb the mountains at work, like higher sales quotas and on-time, on budget product launches.

Pop Quiz: Who would be your climbing partner: Person A or Person B?

Person A says …	Person B says …
Weather conditions look iffy. If we climb really fast, I bet we can beat the storm.	Weather conditions look iffy. I say we wait for a clearer day. Rushing isn’t safe.
I can’t find my self-braking belay. Hope it’s somewhere in my pack.	I can’t find my self-braking belay. We won’t go until I find it.
Ranger said because of recent slides, we should take Route Q, not P like we’ve been planning for a year. Let’s take P route. I’ll get cooler shots with my new camera.	Ranger said because of recent slides, we should take Route Q, not P like we’ve been planning for a year. Let’s re-plan for P and do Q when it’s stable.

How come people who know zero about mountain climbing easily choose Person B? Perhaps it’s because when physical safety literally hangs in the balance, we easily recognize that speaking with a commitment to eliminate uncertain and to reduce risk of injury becomes the #1 priority.

How come what’s clear on the real mountain gets fuzzy on the metaphorical one, the workplace?  Perhaps it’s because the injuries that can be sustained in a metaphorical “office fall” don’t require stitches. They can, however, break trust, crush a career, and even kill a dream.

How much time and energy do you waste fuming about other people not keeping their promises to you? If you said “None”, I bet you’re on a desert island. Or, “Some”, I might guess that you have few expectations of others. Or, “Way Too Much”, my guess is that you’re like most whose work requires effectively coordinating with lots of people.

Working effectively with others is a complex undertaking. Here’s one practice that can reduce the fuming and increase performance. I call the practice “committed speaking and listening”.  (Details on programs that teach this and other business skills at http://www.wipcoaching.com/programs/.)

Nice vs. Necessity

When climbing a mountain, there is a particular language, a jargon used. It sounds like this:

Climber: “On belay?”  Belayer: “Belay on.”  Climber: “Climbing.”  Belayer: “Climb on.”

This language and the matching committed actions must be mastered to fulfill a fundamental commitment of successful climbing– come home unharmed. It’s a language of personal and partner accountability.

Climbers are not offended by the question, “On belay?” The climber doesn’t say to herself, “Well, duh, I’m the one climbing; she should be belaying me, so why ask?  What else is she doing anyway?” Or, “Will he think I’m bossy if I ask if the belay is on? Will he think I don’t trust him?  The belayer is not muttering under her breathe, “I said ‘Belay on’, what’s up with her saying she’s climbing? I know that, already!”

It’s not nice to be certain and clear if you are climbing Yosemite’s El Capitan, it is a necessity to surviving.

Words that hold both ends of the Accountability Rope

Physical safety is not a concern for most workers.  Our goals are more in line with getting opportunities for advancement, being recognized and rewarded for our contribution, feeling like what we do matters and has a purpose. Achieving these goals depends on how often we say “x” will happen, and “x” happens and on our individual and collective levels of accountability.

Climb into your workspace and listen to the language of your team. What do you hear? In many of the organizations I consult, in the beginning, I hear “we’ll see …; let’s hope…; maybe …” It fascinates me how often the language of certainty and clarity are missing – and missing that it’s missing! (BTW: the language changes as we work together.)

There’s a language, a jargon, that creates accountability. It sounds like this:

Requestor: “Please email me the complete list by 3:00pm Wednesday.” (On Belay?)

Promisor: I will and I understand a completed list includes x and z. Is that right? (Belay on.)

Requestor: Yes. (Climbing)

Promisor: I will. (Climb on.)

When someone makes a promise to you, you become their partner in fulfilling it. When they say, “I promise to give you the report by this Thursday, 3:00pm” and you say: “OK”, you become the committed listener. When Thursday, 3:05pm comes and the report is not delivered, your commitment is to contact them and find out what’s up.

Shouts from the peanut gallery (thou doth protest too much)

“How come I have to follow them up? Why don’t they just do what they said? And why don’t they contact me with the ‘what’s up’? It’s her promise, not mine! I’ve got plenty of my own promises that I have to keep. I can’t take the time to track everyone else’s, too!!”

Two ends to the accountability rope: committed speaking & listening. Both must be upheld if you want to make it to the next mountain top and beyond.

 

What I am advocating is a way to cut through the noise that squashes productivity: Replace the time and energy spent on blaming others or wondering what’s happening with a practice of committed speaking and listening. This practice will allow you to determine the appropriate level of trust to have with specific people in specific areas (yes, there are levels of trust, not one-size-of-trust-fits-all), and it gives you a way to build accountability where it is missing.

Regardless of which mountain you are climbing, speaking the language of commitment is essential for success.  Rather than rely on luck or hope, hold up your end of the rope with timely follow through and compassion for the human being holding the other end.  The more you do, the more mountain tops you’ll reach. Climb away!

The Art of a Successful Partnership: Staying Engaged After Saying “I do!”

February 14th, 2011

Ahh, February, the Love month, host of Valentine’s Day. The day millions of us express our love with flowers, chocolates and those sugar hearts with goofy sayings.  The day thousands will pop the question and become engaged.

If you’ve been engaged or just plain head-over-heels in love, I bet you can remember how great you felt: energized, empowered, able to leap tall buildings. All was right with the world.  You may also recall when the bliss began to blister and it took more energy, attention and communication to keep your promise to be the best partner ever.

It’s like that for us when we begin a new job. We’re energized, ready to give our all and contribute to our own and the company’s success. We’re open, listening, willing to learn. Then, as time passes, the bliss fades, the grind sets in. We become disengaged. We’re at work, but we’ve quit showing up as the contributor we promised ourselves we would be.

Disengagement is not an anomaly on the work front. In 2008, a study by The Gallup Organization estimated that 6 out of 8 American workers, almost 22 million, were extremely negative or “actively disengaged” at work and calculated the cost to the American economy of that disengagement to be almost $300 billion per year.

I think the cost to the American psyche is much higher. When we’re disengaged, our performance and satisfaction decrease. The more we stay disengaged and go through the motions, the harder to re-engage. It doesn’t have to be that way. Being disengaged happens. Staying disengaged is a choice.

Now, more than ever, each of us needs to re-connect with our values and re-engage at work, at home and in our communities. (Want to learn more about the impact of disengagement? View my free webinar: Values: The Energy Source for Employee Engagement, http://unboundideas.com/past-events/camille-smith/.)

When people have a heart-felt connection between what they value and the company’s purpose, they are naturally engaged. They are self-motivated (the only true motivation) and bring extra energy to their role.  Who doesn’t want that?

How to stay engaged:

1.    Know what you do and don’t value.  What energizes you? What drains you? When our values are satisfied, we’re in our performance zone. When they aren’t, stress and poor performance appear.  True, we can’t always do what energizes us. Knowing what does can help us make it through what doesn’t.

2.    Satisfy your values on & off the job. Connect your values to your work. Where your job doesn’t fulfill a value, get it satisfied elsewhere. Volunteer. Get a hobby. Be creative.

3.    Start today. Employees: Don’t wait for leaders to do this for you. They can’t. Leaders: Lead. It’s your job to provide opportunities for everyone, including yourself, to be engaged.

Being engaged is good for you, those around you and for your business. Plus, the feeling lasts way more than one sugar-coated day. Who wouldn’t want that?

Got a Goal? Get Focused!

January 13th, 2011

Yogi Berra grins: If you don’t set goals, you can’t regret not reaching them. Novelist Rosalyn McMillan advises: When you want something in life, you have to focus.

Both good points. But what happens when something blocks our progress? Do we focus on the goal and ignore the obstacle? Or, do we focus on removing the obstacle, then, once removed, go back to focusing on the goal?

Welcome to what you can and should expect when you set a goal: obstacles and breakdowns.  Rather than wondering whether to focus on either the goal or the obstacle, I advocate a “both/and” approach:  See the obstacle as an integral, necessary part of the process of achieving your commitment.  Here’s what I mean:

When you create a commitment, you create a lens through which you interpret circumstances, people and events. Your commitment lens has something show up as an obstacle.  Commit to making your house 2-year-old proof for the visiting grandchild. The knickknacks you dusted yesterday now look like potential missiles to poke eyes out. The obstacle to what you want to achieve is an obstacle because of your commitment.  The more unpredictable and outrageous your commitment, the hairier the obstacles.  Think about the declaration to put a man on the moon and return him safely when there was no agreement in the scientific community about whether liquid or solid fuel was the right propellant.

No commitment, no obstacle. Obstacles are integral to your commitment.  Effectively dealing with the obstacle is the path to achieving your commitment

Obstacles: Pathways to commitments What is my commitment? What is the obstacle? What does the obstacle reveal about what I need to address? What actions that are consistent with my commitment will I take to address the obstacle?

Validate what I am saying with your own experience.  Examine a relationship: a forever commitment made today knowing not what tomorrow brings. Or, examine something easier, like a DIY home improvement project.

We are redoing our well-worn, 22-year-old deck. Our commitment is to have a deck that looks cool, requires low maintenance, recycles existing boards and makes us happy. We planed old boards to reveal gorgeous, coral-red heartwood.  Commitment to recycle realized!  The boards soaked up the redwood stain. Commitment to cool look realized!  Unanticipated result: the dark stain shows all, and I do mean all, footprints, ours and the raccoons.  Obstacle to low maintenance identified. We love the color more than doing the work to re-stain. Our new commitment:  Happily wash the deck.

This commitment/obstacle relationship occurs whenever you are bringing forth something new, whether creating a new personal relationship, learning a new skill, or transforming your company’s culture from command-and-control to leadership at all levels. The more change your commitment calls for, the more obstacles you may have to deal with.

Interpreting obstacles as indicators of your commitment, rather than reasons to dismiss it, brings new meaning to the phrase “the journey is the destination” and new focus to being the commitment while you are going after it.

Mid-Air Diasaster Avoided: Values Win Over Litigation

December 20th, 2010

Do you know how your values shape your performance? In this story my client gave me permission to share, you’ll hear how his values and his commitment to honor his word guided him. Here’s his story…

On an international flight from China, the captain’s voice woke us: “Will the doctors on board please press their call buttons.” I looked at my watch. It was the middle of the night.  I automatically reached for the button, then lowered my hand. If I get sued, I put my family at risk — the litigation will bankrupt us.

I know there are 500 people on the flight. Surely, there are other doctors who can answer the call. The captain called again: “Will any doctors on board please push their call button and make themselves known.” I looked at my watch again. 7 minutes had passed since the first call.I was really struggling with myself. Come on, someone. I don’t believe I am the only doctor on board!

What do I do?

I pressed my call button and went to the flight attendant. “I’m a doctor.”

I followed her to the business class galley. The person in need was unable to stand unassisted. One of the flight attendants said, “Well, he’s not bleeding. He must not be too bad.”  Fifteen years ago, I would have come down hard on her as I am sure I did on nurses making unqualified assessments. She was ignorant, not ill-intended. She saw what she saw. I saw a guy going downhill quickly, about to go into anaphylactic shock.

The purser had already retrieved the plane’s medical kit and had a syringe in her hand, knowing that if no doctor showed up, she was accountable for injecting something generic into the man that hopefully would help. She gladly handed me the syringe. I inserted an IV, pushed lots of fluids. He stabilized. When we landed, he was put in the hands of the waiting medics.

Days later, back at my corporate desk, as I was answering emails, attending meetings, pushing papers, I heard myself wonder: Is this the right job for me? Is this how I want to use my talents and skills? Does it match my values? Am I satisfied in a way that matters to me?  Am I contributing what I want?

During the incident, as the man’s pulse returned to normal, the purser patted me on the back, saying “you’re an angel.” That respect is what I crave. I don’t always get it, or as much as I want, at my corporate desk.  I was happy the guy stabilized, not just for his sake and his health, but for mine, too.

On that plane, in the middle of the night, life was telling me something. I’m listening. I also heard your voice, Camille, and our conversations about my values. I’m going to stabilize myself and take care of my health by taking care of my values.

[Dear Reader, as you look ahead to the New Year, I invite you to listen what your values are telling you. Honoring your values can help avoid a mid-air, mid-life, mid-career, even a mid-sentence disaster.]

Want to make better decisions? Learn to balance.

November 16th, 2010

Being successful requires making the right decisions at the right time. By “right”, I mean those decisions that effectively move us toward our goals. If you’re like many of us faced with making a critical business decision —who to hire or fire, what product or service to launch or dump, what deal to sign or decline, whether or not to sell your business — you diligently gather facts, ask trusted advisors for their wisdom, toss and turn at night, count the pros and cons on your list, then, with fingers crossed, decide … and hope it will all turn out OK.

We forget that what we have gathered and are basing our decision on are not facts at all, but interpretations. Interpretations are not a problem, as long as you relate to them as interpretation, valid and valuable, just not facts.

To give yourself a more robust perspective from which to make an informed choice that supports your commitment (not a “let’s end the agony and get this over” decision), have balanced conversations which illuminate the interpretations you are gathering. Then listen and learn.

Deepening and Broadening what we know

Two types of conversations illuminate the interpretations we wrap around data and information: inquiry and advocation.  Inquiring seeks knowledge by questioning. Advocating supports a particular position.

One of my past managers and all-time favorite people, Ian Browde, told me about having balanced conversations in 1992. He told me someone had shared this with him. I now pass it along to you. (Thanks, Ian.)

Sometimes we just need the words to begin the conversation.  They are in the chart below. In addition to saying the words (the “doing”), what makes a difference is your willingness to listen and learn (the “being”).

Balanced Conversations
Deepening our learning	Broadening our learning
Inquiring Help me understand why you think … What leads you to think that …? What stops/prevents you from …?	Inquiring What do you/others think? Is there another way of looking at it? Is there anything I might have missed? Do you have anything to add?
Advocating I think/feel … because… My view/opinion is … because …	Advocating I have a different view … I have heard others express that …

When we are more committed to learning rather than being right or reducing our discomfort at not knowing, we can suspend our judgment and listen to diverse ideas, see new possibilities.

By learning the art of conducting balanced conversations, you’ll not only make more informed choices, you’ll deepen your relationships in the process. As my clients attest to, the quality of our relationships is the foundation for results.

Boomers & GenYers Share the Same Bed … of Values

November 3rd, 2010

Recently, I was of the opinion that what Millennials (born 1976-87) value is different from what Boomers (born 1946-64) cherish. More recently, I received another intelligence report from HBR (http://harvardbusiness.org, July-Aug 09), entitled “How Gen Y & Boomers Will Reshape Your Agenda”, with the tag line: Your oldest and youngest talent cohorts demand many of the same things in a workplace.

What? We like the same things? Shut-Up! (ßmy lame attempt as a Boomer to sound like a Millennial.)

I felt younger by the minute as I read about how much I had in common with the younger-something’s.  I felt older by the word as I had to rethink my well-reasoned, air-tight opinion of yesterday.  (Wasn’t the first, won’t be the last time I do this, I assure you.)

The article (www.worklifepolicy.org) concludes that this synchronicity of viewpoints creates a new “center of gravity for human resources management”.  Meaning, the GenYs and the Boomers may pull the work place environment into a similar orbit – one that matches their shared values.  As it turns out, both the Millennials and I like flexible work hours and the opportunity to give back to society.

Wait! Don’t jump to a conclusion and stop thinking. “Shared” doesn’t automatically translate to “Looks and Feels the Same.”   While a GenY and I may both value giving back and being of service, we may choose different ways to express and fulfill it.  Even when we participate in the same activity, such as swinging a hammer for Habitat for Humanity, what it means to us personally may differ. That’s OK and that’s the point!  In my coaching work, “shared” means “share the meaning, talk”, not “be exactly alike.”

Leadership Sidebar: Employee Engagement equals high performance and high attraction and retention. Leaders who offer employees ways to satisfy their individual values and create a meaningful link between individual and corporate values will be rewarded with extraordinary relationships and results. Heads up: Be sure and walk your values talk. If you don’t, you’ll lose the future leaders you need to grow your business. Heads further up: Knowing what you don’t value is as important as knowing what you do.

Millys (they probably hate me calling them that) and Boomers (no, I am not calling myself a “boomy”) can share the same value bed, as long as (1) we each know what our side of the value bed means, (2) we give the other room and share the covers, and (3) we seek to understand what matters to each other.  In doing so, we’ll find the connections and alignment that we’ve been looking for to work successfully together and be happy.

I like that I share values with GenYers. It makes me feel young (not like I feel old, mind you). Even so, every now and then, when I need to be reminded that age really doesn’t matter, I watch the 2009 National Senior Games at Stanford (www.youtube.com/watch?v=aytfWYT1-yQ), check out The Boss, now 60+, (http://www.aarpmagazine.org/entertainment/bruce_springsteen.html), and remember when I rallied for 2 minutes with Martina Navratilova. Ok, it was only 3 balls, but they got over the net! Shut-Up!

Are you a Delegator or a Dropper-off-er?

October 5th, 2010

del-e-gat, vb, to commit powers, functions to another as a agent to carry out powers and functions; to assign responsibility. Synonym: entrust.

Dropping-off.  We ask others to do stuff for us all the time – stuff we don’t want to do, don’t have the time to do, and couldn’t do even if we had the time.  We drop our suits off for pressing (a task we can’t do), our car for an oil change (a task we don’t have time to do), and our children for learning chemistry (a task we don’t know how to do).

We drop off, move on, don’t think about what we dropped off until we pick it up later. Dropping off, appropriate at times, is not delegating.

Right reasons. Let’s own up to why you and I don’t delegate. We say… (1) I’m used to doing it. (2) It’s easier for me to do it. (3) It takes too long to explain to someone what I want. (4) I don’t think they’ll do it right and I’ll probably have to do it over anyway. (5) I don’t want to ask someone to do it because I already don’t like doing it and why would I have them do something I think is unsavory?

These are the right reasons for someone whose role does not include developing others.   Because a leader’s role is to develop people, being an effective delegator is essential.

I consider dropping off a transactional conversation and effective delegating a transformational conversation. (Want to dig deeper into these 2 conversations?  please read Different conversations, different outcomes, http://www.wipcoaching.com/blog.)

Delegating. Effective delegation requires a partnership. It is the intentional act of giving someone the power and support to do something that you are accountable for. When we delegate, we ask the person to think, act and produce a result.

Right Commitment. Being an effective delegator – meaning: the task you delegated gets done to your satisfaction  – is not about getting your stuff done by others. It’s about building the capacity of others.  As with any developmental process, effective delegation takes time and requires understanding what it takes for someone to act and think from your perspective. It takes a commitment to build leaders around you.

I’ve expanded Susan M. Heathfield’s (an about.com guide) take on this topic:  http://humanresources.about.com/cs/manageperformance/a/delegation.htm.

7 Steps for Effective Delegation

1.    Why me? Tell the person why you chose them. What’s in it for them?

2.    Give them the whole task. If you can’t give them the whole task, give them the whole picture so they can see how their part contributes to the whole.

3. Be clear about (a) what you want them to do, what the outcome should look like; (b) a “how to” if it is relevant for success, including if you need to know progress, specify what you need to know and by when.

4.    Share what you know that works. If you foresee potential bumps in the road, tell them what they can do if encountered.

5.    Create a structure for success: (a) Ask them what support they need and provide it; (b) Connect with others they can contact for support; tell the support people who will be acting on your behalf. Do not leave it to the delegate to make this connection; (c) Be available.

6.    Thank them personally, publically and appropriately when task is done.

7.    Debrief. Ask what they learned, request feedback on process. Share what you learned and what might be next in your partnership.

Choose when to drop-off and when to delegate. As the delegator, you are still responsible and accountable for the result whether your hand did it or not. How you respond to the result not being delivered as requested will speak as loudly as your acknowledgement that it did … perhaps, even more so.  Effective delegation builds capacity to perform for both the delegator and delegatee’s and that’s a leadership move for everyone.

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